For carers

Caregiver Burnout: What It Looks Like and What Actually Helps

Caring for someone you love can be one of the most meaningful things you’ll ever do, and one of the most draining. If you’ve searched what to do for caregiver burnout or how to deal with caregiver burnout, you’re probably already close to the edge, and you’ve probably been putting yourself last for a long time.

An older woman holding her husband close on the sofa

Caregiver anxiety, and when stress becomes burnout

Stress is the pressure. Burnout is what’s left when the pressure never lets up. You might notice:

Constant tiredness that sleep doesn’t touch
Feeling resentful, then guilty for feeling resentful
Pulling back from friends because you have no time or energy
Worrying all the time, even when things are calm
Feeling like you’ve lost track of who you were before you became a carer

Caregiver anxiety and depression often go hand in hand with burnout. Burnout isn’t a mental illness in itself, but long-term caring can sit alongside anxiety or low mood, which is why it’s worth getting checked rather than pushing through. Spouse caregiver burnout can be especially hard to spot because you’re caring for the person you’d normally lean on yourself.

A quick self-check (not a diagnosis)

Ask yourself honestly:

Am I more exhausted than I was three months ago?
Have I stopped doing anything that’s just for me?
Do I feel guilty when I take a break?
Am I getting ill more often, or sleeping badly?
Do I feel irritable or tearful with little warning?

If you said yes to most of these, you’re not weak, you’re overstretched, and that’s worth acting on.

A young woman sitting closely beside an older woman

How to prevent caregiver burnout

Accept specific help. When someone offers, have a ready answer (“could you sit with him on Tuesday afternoon?”).
Protect one small break a day, even ten minutes.
Tell your GP you’re a carer. It can open up support you didn’t know about.
Look into respite or carers’ services in your area.
Stop trying to do it perfectly. Good enough is enough.

Just for you

Ten minutes that are only yours

Carers rarely get long breaks, so short ones matter more. A guided self-hypnosis session can give you a few minutes to let your body come down, when you can’t go anywhere. Growth Zone has short sessions for stress and for sleep, so you can fit one into the gaps.

If it’s more than you can carry alone

If you’re feeling hopeless, or you can’t see a way through, please talk to your GP or someone you trust. Carers UK (carersuk.org) offers advice and support specifically for carers, and free support is available in most countries at findahelpline.com. If you’re in immediate danger, call your local emergency number.

If you need more support

If it’s more than everyday pressure, you are not on your own. Free, confidential helplines in almost every country are listed at findahelpline.com. The World Health Organization also offers a free illustrated guide to coping with stress, “Doing What Matters in Times of Stress”.

UK, NHS staff: NHS Practitioner Health, 24/7 crisis text line. Text NHSPH to 85258.
UK and Ireland: Samaritans. Call 116 123.
United States: 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. Call or text 988.
Canada: 9-8-8 Suicide Crisis Helpline. Call or text 9-8-8.
Australia: Lifeline. Call 13 11 14.

Fit a little calm into the gaps

Short sessions for stress and for sleep, for the moments you can’t go anywhere.

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